When Someone Comes Out: A PFLAGers Guide to Demonstrating Support and Acceptance

The term “coming out” has become so mainstream that many people assume that the word—and the actions it entails—are simple. However PFLAGers know that it can still be a harrowing...

On Demand
February 27, 2019

The Unknown Depths of a Parent's Love

You never know how much love you have for your child until you’re challenged. Being a southern Black woman from a traditional background prepared me to raise my children well, but when one of my children came out to me...

Blog
February 25, 2019

PFLAG National Responds to UMC Vote

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Today, PFLAG National—the nation’s first and largest organization for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ+) people, their families, and allies—issued the followin

press

Training Toolkit: When Someone Comes Out: Demonstrating Support and Acceptance

Thank you for joining PFLAG National's learning session! On this page, you'll find additional resources to expand your learning -- and hopefully help answer any questions that you may have.

PFLAG...

resource
January 2, 2019

PFLAG Helps Teen Come Out

"His dad’s acceptance evolved rather quickly. Within a year of Adams transition, Mr. Miller was attending PFLAG meetings regularly and even marched in Atlanta’s Pride parade with the PFLAG chapter."

news
December 16, 2018

Just one gay acquaintance can change hearts and minds on LGBTQ rights

"Those who were previously opposed or ambivalent about gay and lesbian people can change their hearts and minds," Owen said.

news
September 27, 2018

Three mothers form South Bay chapter of PFLAG

"Linda Reeves, along with two other mothers of gay children — Cindy Byrne and Tina Sarafa — will soon launch the first Manhattan Beach and South Bay chapter"

news
December 13, 2018

Talking Inclusively: December 2018

Welcome to Talking Inclusively, a monthly series designed by PFLAG National’s Straight for Equality program to create conversation about intersectionality, LGBTQ issues, inclusion and more! Each month we’ll offer an article on diverse topics and suggest a few questions that you...

Blog
December 6, 2018

Sam Thoron, former PFLAG president, dies at 79

Sam Thoron sold insurance and raced sports cars — but he was better known for changing the lives of thousands of straight families with gay children.

news

Family Acceptance Within Families of Color

In January 2018 the “Best-in-Show” series began, featuring the highest rated sessions from the PFLAG National Convention in Portland, OR. This month we're joined by chapter leaders from PFLAG chapters...

On Demand

Training Toolkit: Family Acceptance within Families of Color

Thanks for participating in “Family Acceptance Within Families of Color”  with Marsha, Kelly, Monica, and Sheila. One of our key goals is to help you take the information that you...

resource
December 11, 2017

PFLAG National Board Member Susan Thronson "Won't Be Denied"

"Family acceptance for LGBTQ youth who face homelessness and attempt suicide at tragic and unacceptable levels.

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Keeping Siblings Seen and Supported with Dr. Anderson and Mr. Doherty

Gender diversity impacts everyone in a family.  When a family stands out for any reason, each member is likely to handle this differently.   In the community, siblings of gender...

On Demand

Nuestros Seres Queridos Trans: Una Nueva Traducción al Español

Estamos muy orgullosos de anunciar el primero de nuestras nuevas traducciones actualizadas en Español de todas nuestras publicaciones nacionales de PFLAG. La miembro de la junta Isolda Atayde lidera el...

resource
October 25, 2017

Disney's ANDI MACK: A Journey of Self-Discovery and Self-Acceptance

ANDI MACK, an immensely popular show on the Disney Channel, has its season two premiere this Friday night (8pm ET/PT)...and is a ground-breaking episode: One of the lead characters begins a coming-out process that will continue throughout the season. 

If...

Blog
October 10, 2017

Coming Out Day 2017: Creating the Safety and Extended Family Support System We Need

It’s National Coming Out Day, and PFLAG is thrilled to celebrate our own coming out day--nearly 45 years ago--alongside all of the amazing LGBTQ people in queer history, in our networks, and across the nation, who have had the strength...

Blog

Gender Basics for Parents with Joel Baum

Discussions of gender are everywhere these days. Unfortunately, these discussions can leave us more confused than ever. Whether for your own information, or to help you support parents of...

On Demand
September 18, 2017

Happy #BiWeek... What Will YOU Do?

I was really fortunate to come into national LGBTQ work as the Bi movement was exploding. 

Some of my first friendships in my now 30-year life in DC were with intrepid Bi activists. I watched Bi leaders fight for inclusion...

Blog
August 27, 2017

#ParentsComingOut Coverage

PFLAG's #ParentsComingOut video, in partnership with 3M, was shared far and wide, not just in social media but in the press too!

Here's just some of that coverage:

news
August 20, 2017

A Note to My Kid: #ParentsComingOut

Family support makes a transformative difference in the lives of people who come out as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer. And when parents and families share their stories--coming out in support of their LGBTQ children and loved ones--they not...

Blog
July 10, 2017

PFLAG and other pro-LGBT organizations advocate at Southern Baptist Convention’s annual meeting

Liz Owen, director of communications for PFLAG National, attended the Phoenix event and says it confirmed that LGBT acceptance is a value that r

news
June 29, 2017

PFLAGers Take Pride

For the past month, parades, marches, festivals, workshops, picnics, and parties have taken place around the world to celebrate LGBTQ Pride Month, which honors the Stonewall riots which took place in 1969 in New York City. PFLAGers...

Blog
June 20, 2017

Parents: Quick Tips for Supporting Your LGBTQ Kids--and YOURSELF--During the Coming-Out Process

When a loved one comes out, reactions vary, from “Now that I know, what can I do to support my child?” to “How will I ever handle this?” For some people, it’s a combination of these two reactions…and more. There...

Blog

Health Risk Behaviors among Gender Expansive Students with Alison Gill

In addition to transgender youth, gender expansive (also called gender nonconforming or nonbinary) youth are receiving a great deal of attention in the media and among educators and policymakers. However,...

On Demand
April 20, 2017

Trans Student's Journey to Activist...and President of PFLAG Pasadena

Today, Aiden, 28, is pursuing his master’s degree, married, and is an activist in the LGBTQ community as president of the Pasadena chapter of PFLAG, an advocacy group.

news

Training Toolkit: Powerful Partnerships...Making Diversity & Inclusion Successful in PFLAG Chapters

Thanks for participating in PFLAG National’s Powerful Partnerships...Making Diversity & Inclusion Successful in PFLAG Chapters. One of our key goals is to help you take the information that you learned...

resource
January 16, 2017

Psychology Today Recommends PFLAG on Blog

This is a national support and advocacy group primarily for parents of LGBT people that has hundreds of local chapters, so there is likely to be one near you. 

news
January 16, 2017

Welcome, REAL O'NEALS Fans!

Pat and Kenny O'Neal get their PFLAG parent hug on.Welcome to fans of The Real O'Neals! We're so glad you're watching the show, and so glad you found us here at PFLAG.
...

Blog
December 17, 2016

Psychology Today Suggests PFLAG to Readers

Show support and acceptance of your child even if you are struggling with your feelings...You can join your local chapter of PFLAG to find groups and activities that support gay, lesbian, bisexual

news
December 15, 2016

Organizations Provide Holiday Assistance for At-Risk LGBTQ Youth

Elizabeth Kohm, the organization's interim executive director, told NBC Out PFLAG begins to think about its holiday strategy as early as September.

news
December 9, 2016

A PFLAG Founder Remembered: Adele Starr

Just as it would be impossible to tell the story of PFLAG without telling the story of founder Jeanne Manford, it would be impossible to tell the story of PFLAG National without telling the story of Adele Starr. So we...

Blog
November 29, 2016

OK Gazette Profile of PFLAG RD Kay Holladay

When Kay Holladay’s son David came out to his family at age 16, there were no tears or confusion and there was no teeth-gnashing or condemnation.

news
September 6, 2016

Dear Abby Recommends PFLAG

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 26-year-old who is about to come out as transgender. I was born a male and will be transitioning into a female.

news

Our Children

OUR CHILDREN offers a fresh eye for families and others about what to do when a loved ones comes out.

resource
Hands hold a religious text.
July 14, 2016

LDS Church and Suicide Prevention

This past November, LDS church leaders declared those in same-sex marriages apostates. The resolution prevents children of such couples from becoming church members or partaking in baptism until after the...

Blog
May 17, 2016

NQAPIA’s API Family Acceptance Campaign

Right on the heels of  Asian/Pacific Islander (API) Heritage Month, the National Queer Asian Pacific Islander Alliance (NQAPIA) has just announced the launc

news

Copyright and Marriage Equality Act

This bill redefines “widow” and “widower” in federal copyright law to include surviving spouses in all legal marriages valid at time of death for the...

action

The Veteran Spouses Equal Treatment Act

The Veteran Spouses Equal Treatment Act amends sections of Title 38 of the US Code to give all LGBTQ veterans and their families access to their VA benefits regardless of their...

action

Every Child Deserves a Family Act (ECDF)

ECDF would prohibit any child welfare service provider receiving federal assistance and involved in adoption or foster care placements from...

action

Faith In Our Families

Discovering that a loved one is LGBTQ+ can pose new questions about your faith and may prompt you to re-evaluate beliefs that you previously took for granted. By using personal...

resource
April 24, 2016

One Mother's Voice: PFLAG Cofounder Recalls Group's Beginnings

One mother's support and acceptance of her gay son led to the creation of a national support group for gays, lesbians and their families.

Jeanne Manford needs few words to make the most complex questions simple. "I loved him," she...

Blog

Recommended Reading: Coming Out

The reading list below is an excellent starting point in your coming-out journey ahead, since many of the titles listed cover the process both for those who are navigating a...

resource
April 20, 2016

Faith FAQ

For many people of faith, coming out or learning a loved one has come out can bring up several questions. PFLAG offers some answers, advice, and considerations for working through these difficult questions.

Blog
Senior portrait of Andres Riveria-Vazquez
November 30, 2015

Meet Another 2015 PFLAG National Scholar!

In our most recent edition of the PFLAGPole (Winter 2016), we were excited to highlight some of the LGBTQ and ally youth who received scholarships from PFLAG National and our funding partners, including Dow (GLAD)...

Blog

A note from Mormon mom Kathleen to her friend Emily

When her son Charlie* came out publicly, Mormon mom Kathleen* received mostly positive feedback,
...
Blog

A letter from Laurin to her son, Danny

I tell my son I love him all the time. I also tell him that I'm very...
Blog

A letter to my unborn child...

Dear...you:

Yes you, you in there, the one who keeps kicking me, and whose hiccups I'm feeling all the time (are you drinking in there??), and whose sonogram started out looking a bit like a kidney bean and now looks...

Blog

A gay son's open letter to his parents...can this rift heal?

Normally the letters we share are uplifting, supportive, affirmative...unconditionally loving. Today, however, we're sharing an article about this letter from gay blogger Patrick Bradley--which was originally published by Out magazine--courtesy of our friends at...
Blog
Abstract photo of holiday lights.
November 24, 2015

S4E: Allies and the Holidays

Holiday time can be incredible--seeing family and friends, parties, gift exchanges. At the same time, they can be stressful when we find ourselves sharing space with people whose opinions on LGBT equality are…well, not exactly where we’d hope they’d...
Blog
March 2, 2015

Until I See Skylar Again...

We are proud to share this piece from PFLAG mom and National board member Marsha Aizumi, though heartbroken that we have to. With thanks to Huffington Post Gay Voices, where it was originally posted.

***

There are...

Blog

Mom gives trans daughter a wonderful surprise

Late last month, a mom gave her teenage trans daughter a wonderful surprise...a gift she had been waiting a very long time for.

Said mom in the description of the video she shared of the moment on...
Blog
Jody Huckaby family and Stephanie Battaglino
September 30, 2015

Family, Faith and PFLAG

Today, we hear from our Executive Director, Jody Huckaby, about his experience attending the Pope's visit to the White House.

I took the day yesterday to spend time with my sister, Joan. We started the day at 3:30 AM...

Blog

A Note from Lizbeth About Her Sibling

We received the following note just yesterday, and thought it was a perfect sentiment to share here on...

Blog
April 10, 2019

Two East-Coast Gender Conferences Began With One PFLAG Family’s Dream

In 2008, we were reeling from learning that our 15 year old “son” identified as a trans girl. I was desperate for support for my child, myself, and my family. We felt alone and frightened and had not yet found...

Blog
December 31, 2013

A note from Amy to her daughter, M

Dear M,

Today marks one year that your life changed. That our family's life changed. Our foundation shook just like the steps of your school bus as you sprinted home on your last day of 4th grade. This was the...

Blog

Do you love reading A Note to My Kid? Then send us your own note today!

We love A Note to My Kid...reading each entry, we are beyond moved: we know that somewhere, a person who needs to read these posts is getting exactly the support they need at the exact moment they need it. 

...

Blog

A letter from Brynn to her daughter, Eleanore

Brynn Tannehill is a research scientist, advocate for transgender inclusion in the military and writer. Brynn and her wife, Janis, recently moved to Washington, D.C., with their three children.

Blog
Diane Oviatt pictured with her son
April 30, 2015

Huffington Post: I'm A Mormon Mom Taking A Stand For All The Gay Kids In Our Church

We had to share this lovely--and loving--piece, originally published over at the Huffington Post Religion vertical, from Diane Oviatt, a pediatric oncology nurse and an active church member working with the children in her local congregation.

When her...

Blog
April 5, 2015

Being Transgender for Our Child

my purpleSix months ago, our ten year old began to identify as transgender. This after spending years trying to explain it and find a way to fit in at school and...

Blog

A Note to Logan from "Proud Mom" Carly

Carly originally shared this letter on her blog, and we're honored to share it here as well. Thanks, Carly!

I will start by saying that this Journey has not...

Blog

A Note From Marsha to Her Son, Stefen

Marsha Aizumi with Stefen,
her straight ally son

Dear...

Blog

A note to my son...from mom

Mother and Son
by Niky Never

This is a...

Blog

A Letter to Jacob From His Mom, Mimi

This is an extraordinary and powerful letter, that we are so grateful to its author to be able share with you today. It was originally posted here, at medium.com.

Thank you, Mimi, for sharing your story--and your letter to...

Blog
December 31, 2014

A Letter to My (Possible) Son...from mom

This piece, by writer Lily Burana, was originally published by Dame Magazine. Thanks to Dame and Ms. Burana for letting us share it with you here at A Note to My Kid. To hear more...

Blog

A message of hope and love from the mom of a transgender youth

As a facilitator for Trans Youth Education and Support (TYES), an affiliate of PFLAG, I hear and observe incredible transition stories every day: the young child who hated having his picture taken before he transitioned, who immediately afterward...

Blog
December 31, 2013

The Thorons: A Legacy of Love

Today we hear from Jeff Johnson, a Communications and Policy intern with PFLAG National. Jeff had the opportunity to meet with longtime PFLAG leaders Sam and Julia Thoron. Following is his report on their journey to becoming dedicated PFLAG leaders,...

Blog

A revised birth announcement for Kai Bergert, from his parents Yolanda and Guy

Normally, we would hate to print a retraction. But when it's THIS kind of retraction, well, how can we resist?

Yolanda Bogert and Guy Kershaw...

Blog

A Note to Dear Abby From 'Hurting in Houston'

PFLAG is grateful to have a long and lovely history with Dear Abby. In fact, it was she...

Blog
May 1, 2016

A Note to Miles From his Mom, Erika

Dear Miles:

I think you already know how proud I am of you, and daddy feels the same way. You're a smart, funny, hard-working, and talented young man.  You're also a...

Blog

Do Unto Others: An Open Letter from Violet About Her Gender Nonconforming Child

We're honored to share this open letter from Violet, the mom of a gender nonconforming child. Her words are powerful, moving...and we thank her for letting us share them here.

...
Blog

PFLAG Mom Debi Jackson Shares the Power of PFLAG!

You probably remember Debi, the mom of a trans kid who took to the stage with...

Blog
May 9, 2016

And then sometimes, the kid supports the parents...

We got this sweet video from Lance, whose mom Leslie is the Vice President of PFLAG Fresno. Lance surprised his mom by driving from his home in LA up to Fresno to march with her in the Fresno Pride...

Blog

A note to my beautiful daughter Becca, from Jill

Dearest Becca,

I want to begin by saying how proud I am to be your mom and how impressed I am by your bravery and...

Blog

A son comes out to his mother...but it's not her reaction to his news that is the surprise!

This video has gone viral in the last two weeks, and we aren't surprised! Well, not as surprised as Hayden Smith, the nervous young star of this raw footage, who decided to record his mother's reaction to him coming out....

Blog

A dad’s surprising response to his gay son’s heartwrenching ‘coming out’

Today, courtesy of our friends at lgbtqnation, we bring you this wonderful letter to James from...

Blog

Video: Speak Up with Jimmy Nguyen

Okay, perhaps this is a bit meta, but we couldn't resist sharing this HuffPo video, Digitially Speaking. Why? Because it's all about notes to LGBTQ kids from their parents, and it features A Note to My Kid!

With thanks to...

Blog

A letter from one dad to Michael Sam's dad

Our letter today comes to us courtesy of our friends at outsports.com. Like most of you, we were disappointed to hear that the NFL's first openly gay player, Michael Sam, was cut from the Rams. As we...
Blog
July 31, 2015

A Letter to my Dad, from Kristin

Today at ANTMK we have a special letter, from Kristin Beck to her dad. Kristin is a former US Navy SEAL who gained public attention in 2013 when she came out as a transgender woman. As an activist and advocate...

Blog

A Letter to Blake From His Mom, Susan

Dear Blake,
You are the bravest person I have...
Blog

A Letter to the World from Debi about Her Trans Kid

We received, via Facebook, a note in the form of a video link, asking us to take a watch and a listen as a woman took on the myths about transgender kids.

We watched and, well needless to say, we...

Blog

An oldie but a goodie...A letter from Dad to Nate

It's not quite Throwback Thursday yet, but we couldn't resist revisiting this wonderful letter from a dad in Michigan, to his high-school age son, Nate.

The note first appeared on the Facebook page of an anti-homophobia organization, then went immediately viral....

Blog
December 31, 2015

From RAISING MY RAINBOW: This Is How A Father Should Love

Normally we don't share other blog posts here at A Note to My Kid. But this was such a special post, from one special parent to another, we couldn't resist. We hear so often about the mothers...this Father's Day post was just to gorgeous to ignore.

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A Note from Dad to Holly: Beautiful Blonde Hair of June

My daughter recently posted an Instagram that I want to respond to. 
Now I won't...
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A Note to Mom and Dad From Pete

Mom and Dad,
I know you don't support me or who I am and I currently feel that you never will, although I hope that one day you and the rest of our extremely large family will come around....
Blog
October 29, 2015

A Poem to Tristan from Mom

We received the following via email:

Hello. My name is Dawn Jaksons and I'm a PFLAG mom in Edmond, Oklahoma.

Our son came out to us when he was 14. We told him we loved him no matter what. Accepting

...
Blog
May 4, 2014

Dear Abby Gives A Special Shout-Out to PFLAG Lubbock!

The relationship between PFLAG and advice columnist superstar Dear Abby goes back years. In fact, in the early 1980s when her syndicated column mentioned PFLAG as a resource for parents of gay children, PFLAG’s National Office--which at the time was the...

Blog
March 23, 2014

A Note to Jacob from Dad

Jacob, I write this letter to you to let you know just how much I Love you.

I wish there was another word besides ‘Love’ to say because I feel the word love has lost it’s true meaning, It has...

Blog